Jaw Tension, Chest Tightness, Racing Mind? These 6 Tools Helped Me Calm My Anxiety
- Apr 2
- 8 min read
Updated: Apr 4
Over the past six years, I've learned one thing — the word "anxiety" holds a very different meaning in everyone's personal vocabulary.
For some, it's a weird feeling in the stomach or sweaty palms before an exam. For someone else, it's a paralyzing fear that stops you from leaving the house or doing even the most ordinary things.
Unfortunately, I've been part of that second group.
My experience with anxiety and panic attacks began in 2019, after my 33-year-old fiancé had a heart attack in our home — right in front of me. That event changed everything. The new definition of anxiety became a constant fear that something bad would happen to me. An anxious feeling that made me extremely uncomfortable everywhere.
And you know what? I was never like that before.
I was normal.
But now, even the smallest bodily sensation either made me rush back home or wonder whether I needed a medical check-up. And ironically, even after the check-up, I would still doubt the results.
Because...what if?
What Can Help With Anxiety?
I've spent years chasing that "one magical answer" - a fix that would make me feel normal again. I've tried a psychiatrist, psychologist, Bach flower therapy, Kundalini yoga, a post traumatic growth coach, acupuncture, Theta Healing, and even tarot cards. I've turned the pages of countless self-help books and read stories of people who overcame anxiety. I've searched outside and inside. I've felt hopeful and hopeless.
When I look back on what’s truly helped me, three key pillars stand out:
✔︎ The best decision has been a professional help - my psychologist, who knows how to address the source of the anxiety, help me question my thoughts and listens me.
✔︎ Regular physical activity and nutrition.
✔︎ Specific techniques I can turn to when the s*it hits the fan. The ones that quickly calm down an anxiety attack, relax my tight chest and jaw muscles, and bring me back to the present.
These 6 Tools Can Help Reduce Anxiety & Improve Well-Being
I've decided to open my toolbox that hopefully can help someone who is trying to beat, manage, deal...(you name it!) anxiety and feel yourself again.
As my psychologist always tells me: "The key is not to use them only when you feel anxious, but to make them part of your daily routine and practice them when you also feel okay. "
Table of Contents:
1. How I Relieve Chest Tightness from Anxiety
Whenever I get that heavy, tight feeling in my chest that gradually has built up and made my chest muscles feel like tightened plastic wrap, I turn to this Chest Pain Release from Stress 10 Minute Daily Routine.
I discovered this video about four years ago, and it's still the best tool I've found to ease chest tightness caused by anxiety. Their YouTube channel shares helpful mental health videos for adults dealing with anxiety, depression, and loneliness.
Three Simple Techniques to Release Jaw Tension
The best advice I've ever received for relaxing tense jaw muscles came from an osteopath:
Make a clicking (or popping) sound with your tongue. It’s that movement where you press your tongue against the roof of your mouth and then release it quickly. In Estonia, we call it the sound of horse hooves 🐴 hitting the ground.
I start doing this whenever I feel the tension building up.
The second best advice came from my massage therapist (and my friend got the same tip from her dentist):
Just open your mouth and let it hang wide open, even until saliva starts to drip out. Do this a few times during the day.
Gua Sha practice and Sovietic home remedy 🧦.
I've been practicing daily Gua Sha for over a year now and I can't say is there any proof behind it, but it does feel good and relaxing. I like to warm the Gua Sha stone under hot water before and during the routine.
And for the last technique I take an old sock (clean though 😉), fill most of it with previously heated sea salt (not too hot - don't burn yourself!) and hold it against the areas that are tense. The heat gives a sense of relief.
3. A Breathing Exercise That Calms Me Fast
One of the first techniques my psychologist showed me was a simple deep breathing exercise called diaphragmatic breathing. I admit, I was very skeptical because I couldn't believe that something as basic as breathing could actually help me with anxiety. I even thought: "Am I really paying for advice like that?"
But surprisingly, this technique turned out to be one of the most effective tools for managing my anxiety attacks — even in the middle of the night. I was advised to practice it for 5 to 7 minutes whenever I feel anxious.
How I Practice it
I usually close my eyes and listen to some (ad-free!) meditation music. I like using this 3-minute track, because sometimes, when I am anxious, 7 minutes of slow breathing can feel like a lot. But once I get past those first three minutes, I already feel calmer and just hit repeat for another round.
Once I'm sitting comfortably with my eyes closed, I place my left hand over my stomach. I inhale slowly through my nose, making sure my belly expands as I breathe in. Then, I exhale through mouth as slowly as possible, drawing my belly button toward my spine.
I also like to incorporate a right hand-movement while doing it: as I breathe in, my right hand moves up in front of my belly, and as I breathe out, it moves to the right side (like an orchestra conductor hand movement). But that’s just something I do. Normally, it's recommended to put one hand on your stomach and the other hand on your chest. I changed that part, because hearing my heartbeat created me more anxiety than relief.
4. This Book Helped Me Understand What Anxiety Actually Is
At one point during my healing journey, I became curious about what exactly happens inside my body and brain when anxiety attacks. I already knew about cortisol and fight-or-flight response, but I wanted to dig deeper and look at it from a logical perspective.
I discovered a book called "Anxiety Relief" by John Crawford, that breaks things down in a very clear and actionable way, offering step-by-step systems to help you find peace again. It doesn’t just repeat the basics or suggest saying affirmations and practicing gratitude (which are helpful, but might not be your go-to during an anxiety attack). The book explains why the "fear of fear" is at the root of most anxiety disorders and how to overcome it, along with many other valuable insights. I like to re-read it from time to time — it always helps me look at things from a new perspective.
"When the limbic system perceives a threat, it quickly moves into alarm mode, and a number of physical processes begin. Within a few milliseconds of sensing a significant threat, an electrical impulse is sent through the nervous system. This is the metallic electrical jolt of alarm, that you feel when a panicky feeling begins.
Less than half a second later, powerful chemical hormones are released into the bloodstream. Amongst these are the hormones. Adrenaline, often known as Epinephrine and Cortisol." (Crawford, 2016, p. 24)
5. How Exercise Helps Me Lower Anxiety Levels
One of the first things my psychologist always asks me is:
"Helery, have you been doing sports lately? You need to do something to get your heart rate up. Yoga is good, but you also need a bit more intense movement."
Regular physical activity helps me feel better, think less about anxiety, and reduce negative thoughts and physical symptoms. I always notice a positive shift in my mood when I move regularly. The emphasis, however, is on the word "regularly" - because the moment I break the habit, anxiety symptoms start to knock on the door again.
Also, whenever I've been taking a longer break from exercise, and then get back on the track again, those first few sessions don't magically lower my anxiety overnight. It takes time, but I always know that the relief will come.
5.1. Finding Motivation To Exercise
To keep myself motivated—especially on the lazy or excuse-filled days—I turn to one of my favorite pieces of advice from Atomic Habits by James Clear:
"I try to remind myself of a simple rule: never miss twice. If I miss one day, I try to get back into it as quickly as possible. Missing one workout happens, but I’m not going to miss two in a row. Maybe I’ll eat an entire pizza, but I’ll follow it up with a healthy meal. I can’t be perfect, but I can avoid a second lapse....The first mistake is never the one that ruins you. It is the spiral of repeated mistakes that follows. Missing once is an accident. Missing twice is the start of a new habit." (Atomichabits.com)
One things that's really helped boost my motivation is using a smartwatch and a running app called Strava. It's more entertaining to get real-time feedback on my progress, participate in different walking and running challenges, and see what my family and friends are up to.
But this is an advanced level of doing exercise.
What I want to say is that building a regular habit of physical activity has taken me years. Honestly, there were many moments when movement made my anxiety worse, not better. I’m sharing this because I don’t want to paint a false picture—like you can just buy sneakers, download an app, and suddenly be anxiety-free. That hasn’t been my story. But I’m proud of the progress I’ve made.
6. Finding Inspiration from other people's stories
I found that reading from people who have beat anxiety gives hope that one day you can do the same. It’s a reminder that progress is possible and that you’re not alone in your journey. One Reddit post I came across shares a very detailed breakdown of different levels of anxiety and the techniques that worked at each stage. It’s full of relatable insights and practical suggestions.
I also followed one of the book recommendations from that thread: "Dare: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks" by Barry McDonagh—and even downloaded the app that comes with it. Maybe it’ll give you a few new ideas too.
Final Thoughts
Wellbeing, mental health, and anxiety are topics that are discussed and searched more than ever before. If you’ve experienced anxiety, you know there are both -good days and bad days.
As I hope for myself, I also wish for you that there will be more and more better days in your future. Understanding how to manage your anxiety is empowering, and I hope you’re not afraid to seek that knowledge whenever you need it.
Take care!
Farera Helery
Note to readers: This article is not a substitute for professional medical advice. While the tools shared here aim to offer support for anxiety relief based on personal experience, it is essential to seek professional care if you suspect you have a medical condition.
Footnotes:
Crawford, J. (2016). Anxiety Relief.
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